Thoughts From Women About Being A Woman
The hardest years in life are those between ten and seventy. * Helen Hayes (at 73)
I refuse to think of them as chin hairs. I think of them as stray eyebrow. * Janette Barber
Things are going to get a lot worse before they get worse. * Lily Tomlin
A male gynecologist is like an auto mechanic who never owned a car. * Carrie Snow
Old age ain’t no place for sissies. * Bette Davis
If you can’t be a good example, then you’ll just have to be a horrible warning. * Catherine Aird
A man’s got to do what a man’s got to do. A woman must do what he can’t. * Rhonda Hansome
The phrase “working mother” is redundant. * Jane Sellman
Whatever women must do they must do twice as well as men to be thought half as good. Luckily, this is not difficult. * Charlotte Whitton
Thirty-five is when you finally get your head together and your body starts falling apart. * Caryn Leschen
Whoever thought up the word “Mammogram”? Every time I hear it, I think I’m supposed to put my breast in an envelope and send it to someone. * Jan King
I try to take one day at a time, but sometimes several days attack me at once. * Jennifer Unlimited
When I was young, I was put in a school for retarded kids for two years before they realized I actually had a hearing loss. And they called ME slow! * Kathy Buckley
I’m not offended by all the dumb blonde jokes because I know I’m not dumb and I’m also not blonde. * Dolly Parton
You see a lot of smart guys with dumb women, but you hardly ever see a smart woman with a dumb guy. * Erica Jong
If high heels were so wonderful, men would still be wearing them. * Sue Grafton
Laugh and the world laughs with you. Cry and you cry with your girlfriends. * Laurie Kuslansky
I think – therefore I’m single. * Lizz Winstead
You know the hardest thing about having cerebral palsy and being a woman? It’s plucking your eyebrows. That’s how I originally got pierced ears. * Geri Jewell
When women are depressed they either eat or go shopping. Men invade another country. * Elayne Boosler
Behind every successful man is a surprised woman. * Maryon Pearson
In politics, if you want anything said, ask a man – if you want anything done, ask a woman. * Margaret Thatcher
I have yet to hear a man ask for advice on how to combine marriage and a career. * Gloria Steinem
I never married because there was no need. I have three pets at home who answer the same purpose as a husband. I have a dog that growls every morning, a parrot that swears all afternoon, and a cat that comes home late every night. * Marie Corelli
If men can run the world, why can’t they stop wearing neckties? How intelligent is it to start the day by tying a noose around your neck? * Linda Ellerbee
Nobody can make you feel inferior without your permission. * Eleanor Roosevelt
The Pros and Cons of One-Night Stands
Maybe you just got dumped, haven’t had sex in longer than you’d like to admit or are just really horny. Whatever the reason, a one-night stand could be the cure. However, if you’re new to sex with strangers, you might be a little leery. Before you hit the clubs on the prowl, check out these pros and cons to make sure the experience is really what you want.
Let’s start with the pros of a one-night stand. The benefits of a tryst with a sexy stranger can include:
• Mind-blowing Sex – One-night stands are often the result of body shots and beer buckets, which can lower shyness and increase experimentation. You’re never going to see him again, so go ahead and try that pretzel-twist or fake British accent if that’s what gets you going.
• Ego Boost – Feeling like you’ve lost your mojo? Making eyes from across the room and closing the deal with ease can make you feel like the world’s sexiest woman.
• Feeling Liberated – Been shackled to the missionary position and polite kissing with boring dudes? Use this as a way to break out of the mold of the “good girl” and enjoy sex like a man.
• “No really, baby, I did it for you.” – A recent study published in the Journal of Human Sexuality showed that friends with benefits, one-night stands and booty calls can actually help people make better decisions when they finally decide to enter long-term relationships.
On the other hand, exploring the sexual playground could leave you getting sand kicked in your face. The cons could come along with a quickie.
• Sexually Transmitted Diseases – You don’t know this person very well and therefore are in the dark about his or her sexual health and history. You may also be inebriated, which can cause you to do things, like have sex without protection, that you normally would not.
• You Could Become Depressed – Making one-night stands a regular thing could mean you’re seeking something you can’t get from regular relationships. Beware of these interactions if you start feeling used or guilty.
• Becoming Attached – Sorry, ladies, but some of us have a hard time separating sex and emotions. If the thought of a guy sneaking out in the night or not taking you to brunch after you’ve spent the night doing the nasty makes you upset, you should skip the one-night stand.
Got the good and bad and you’re still ready to go? When trolling for a one-time night of passion, you can put these tactics to the test to get what you are looking for.
• Put yourself in the right situation – Places like weddings, holiday parties, dance clubs and hotels are breeding grounds for one-night stands. People are in high spirits, drinking and ready to have a good time.
• Look Like You’re Having Fun – No one is going to hit on you if you look like your dog just died. Get out on the dance floor, tell jokes, do a shot – show guys that up for anything and looking to have fun.
• Protect Yourself – Keep an eye on your drink, and if you leave with a guy, let your friends know where you are going and when you expect to be back. Pop a few condoms in your clutch – nothing makes a temporary experience more permanent than a baby or disease.
• Play it Cool – Even if you are new to one-night stands, don’t tell your potential hookup, and don’t expect a relationship. By keeping your expectations in check you can prevent possible disappointment.
• Be Mysterious – The point of this exercise is to be anonymous and fleeting. Don’t even use your real name if you can help it, and refrain from contacting him on social media post-coitus.
• Don’t Feel Guilty – Society has programmed women to feel bad about exploring and embracing their sexuality. You won’t feel sexy or be able to enjoy the experience if you’re worried about looking like a “slut” the whole time.
• Stick with a Stranger – Hooking up with a friend, coworker or a relative of a friend can cause awkwardness in the light of day. Keeping it strictly-stranger can help you avoid problems and embarrassing run-ins.
In the end, you should do what you feel comfortable with and not feel pressured. If you find yourself in a situation that scares you or makes you feel uncomfortable, get out of there. Just because you started something with a guy doesn’t mean you have to finish it. On the other hand, it can be a great exercise in pushing your personal boundaries and creating new life experiences to do something out of the ordinary and challenge yourself.
By thinking through the options beforehand you can ensure that you are making the right decision – even if you feel bad about it later, don’t beat yourself up for too long. After all, you will never see that person again and you don’t even need to tell your friends about the one-night stand if you don’t want to. Keeping it to yourself can be a great little secret that adds to your mystery and relationship wisdom.
5 Web Sites That Should NEVER Pop Up in Your Man's Browser
Porn may be an exciting way to freshen up your sex life. So you may look at such sites as a plus, not so much as an insurmountable crisis.
However, every woman has her own view of porn. You’d be wise to draw your own conclusions on this subject. But if you feel pornography shouldn’t be part of your man’s browser, use this topic as an excuse to have an open discussion about what you want from this relationship. It might take your bond in a new and important direction.
Some men like to explain that they’re just on these types of sites to meet people. It’s as innocent as that. But if this is really the case, why choose sites that are designed to create romantic attachments? That’s the question you have to ask yourself in a situation like this.
But there is always the possibility that your main squeeze is simply curious about homosexual love. It may not be anything more than that. Of course, this can be a very embarrassing topic and one that the man in your life is hesitant to admit. Yet this secret interest may be the true reason behind his habit of storing gay sites on the home PC.
Still, the fact that you’ve found these web sites should give you reason to take a step back and really look at this relationship. It could be that your man is truly attracted to his own sex. If this is the real reason for his behavior, it will certainly get in the way of the romantic aspect of your attraction.
Couples counseling may be the way to go to figure out the next step in your relationship.
Every aspect of the faith you thought you had in each other is under scrutiny because he has revealed that he doesn’t believe in you. Whether his paranoia is because of past infidelities or he just has problems trusting women in general, this doesn’t bode well for your future as a couple.
The fact that he’s taken this extreme step to watch you online when you don’t have a clue he’s around brings up other disturbing questions. Where are his ethics? Does he have any? And if he is going out of his way to monitor you so secretively, what kind of information is he holding back from you?
These are all topics that need to be discussed before you can build any kind of trust with this man again. Otherwise, this cagey behavior is only going to get worse, building a foundation of suspicion on what should be a satisfying relationship.
Married Or Cheating Types of Sites
Not only does this discovery speak volumes about your hubby’s trustworthiness, but it says a lot about his respect for you in general. The slogan for one site is, “Join us today! It’s free. Don’t be married and bored or married and lonely. You can have fun meeting up with other marrieds in your area for married affairs and much more.”
Sadly, however, the act of having an affair has been glamorized on the internet. Some of these sites actively promote the excitement of this kind of passionate liaison, creating marketing slogans that make immoral behavior fun. Your significant other may just be one of the many men who fall victim to a catchy advertising campaign, even at the expense of your marriage.
40 Things You Should Know About Sex by Age 40
Smart sex advice on everything from kissing to dirty talk to whether size really matters
Does your sex life need a makeover? Here’s your chance to brush up. From sex myths to sexual etiquette to health-boosting bedroom tips, these are the truths about sex every woman should know.
1. He doesn’t care if you’ve shaved
2. Wide beats long every time. If you care at all about penis size (and studies show that women are far more into how penises look than how they’re hung), you know that width matters more than length.
3. All the girls are doing it. Masturbating, that is. In a 2004 survey by AARP, nearly half the women between the ages of 45 and 49 said they had taken matters into their own hands in the previous 6 months. And many women have used more than just their hands. In a 2009 survey by the University of Indiana, more than half the respondents had used a vibrator at least once, and nearly one in four had used one in the previous month.
4. He likes the cuddling part, too…and not just because he’s half comatose when you snuggle up after sex. During lovemaking, both men and women release the chemical oxytocin—the so-called “cuddle hormone” that helps new moms bond with their babies. So what does than mean for men? Oxytocin boosts their desire for intimacy, along with their feelings of trust, according to a 2008 study by the University of Zurich. And in this case, what’s good for the gander is good for the goose.
5. You really can tell a guy’s size by his hands. The longer a man’s ring finger, the longer his penis, a study by University of Liverpool shows. Both are determined by the amount of testosterone he was exposed to in the womb. If his ring finger is the same size or smaller than his index finger, he received lower levels of testosterone. If it’s bigger…watch out!
6. It’s worth a try. Variety is the spice of life…and of sex. Whether you do it in a hammock or an airplane; on the kitchen floor or in the shower; dressed in leather or in lace, if it’s new, it’s improved.
7. Porn is hot. The idea that women take longer to get aroused just isn’t true. Show us some skin and we’re off and running. In a 2007 study, women who watched porn got turned on as quickly as men did. Using thermal imaging technology, researchers at McGill University in Montreal found that while watching porn, men became fully aroused in 664.6 seconds (11 minutes), compared to women, who took 743 seconds (12 minutes).
8. Say Ohh instead of Ohm. Craving the calm you get from yoga? Go for an orgasm instead. You feel relaxed after climaxing because you were practically brain-dead while you were doing it. Using scans to measure brain activity, researchers from the Netherlands found that women experience no emotions during orgasm—including fear, anxiety and stress. When you’re in the throes, there’s no worrying about the kids’ report cards, the weekly grocery list or the pile of bills on your desk. But it’s a chicken and egg situation: The only way to reach orgasm is to clear your head of that stuff to begin with.
9. Faking it: pointless. Showing him what you like: brilliant
10. It’s better with your socks on. If your sex life isn’t hot, it may be because you’re cold. Research from the Netherlands shows that couples with cold feet had a harder time reaching orgasm—only 50% made it. When couples put on socks, the jumped to 80%.
11. Honesty: Not always the best policy. So you’ve thought about cheating—maybe even stolen a kiss or snuck out for coffee. Should you confess to make up for it? No way. Coming clean only inflicts pain on your partner and damages his sense of trust. If you want to protect him and keep your relationship going, swallow your guilt and keep your mouth shut.
12. Love is in the air… as long as your man doesn’t shower after his workout. The musky smell of male sweat can be a real turn-on for women. In a 2007 study from the University of California at Berkeley, the scent of a man boosted women’s sexual arousal, mood, heart rate, blood pressure and breathing rate.
13. It’s never too late. Even if having sex is something you do only on birthdays and Bastille Day you can always get back on the stick. All you have to do is…have sex. You may have to force yourself at first, but the more you do it, the more you want to do it. Start with once a month, then once a week, and who knows? Maybe you’ll be a once-a-day woman.
14. When it comes to how big, how often, how many times in one night, your friends are lying
15. It’s the next best thing to being there… but not that many forty-something’s know it. According to a 2004 survey by AARP, only 17% of men and 18% of women between the ages of 45 and 49 had phone sex.
16. Nobody does it better than you. You can lie around waiting for your partner to bring you to orgasm, but you’ll get there a lot faster if you take care of it yourself. When women masturbate, they typically climax in less than 4 minutes. When they’re engaged in foreplay and intercourse, it can take 20 minutes. Your best bet for a speedy climax: using a vibrator.
17. Fantasy is fabulous. If your regular sex routine is a little stale, invite Johnny Depp and his pirate hat into bed with you. Losing yourself in a sex fantasy spices up the real thing, and boosts your overall sex drive. Sharing certain fantasies can add even more zip. In a 2004 ABC News poll, more than half of all men and women said they talk about their fantasies to boost their sex lives. The most common fantasies? Unexpected sex, threesomes, and sex at work.
18. If you’re too tired, it’s too bad for him. The best thing about getting older is that you can do—or not do—whatever you want. Say it nicely, and your partner should understand if you’ve got a headache or you want to watch the Desperate Housewives marathon instead of making love. Unless, of course, the marathon—or the headache—is a weekly event.
19. Size matters—to him. A survey of 50,000 heterosexual men and women showed that the vast majority of women (85%) felt satisfied by their man’s size, while nearly half of all men (45%) were unhappy with their package. Let him know he’s all you need.
20. He doesn’t care if you wear flannel to bed
21. Money isn’t everything…but when it comes to sex, it certainly helps. Women who had wealthy husbands or boyfriends reported having more orgasms than those who didn’t, according to a 2009 survey by the University of Newcastle in England.
22. Good kissing is a good sign. Studies show that women tend to assess a relationship by how skilled his smooching is. And they’re more likely to have sex with a man who does it well
23. Ladies first. You’re likely to be eager—if not aching—to give right after you’ve received. So everyone wins if he gets you off first.
24. Intercourse doesn’t cut it. In case you thought you were the only one, you’ll want to know that nearly one-third of women don’t have orgasms during intercourse. That’s because thrusting rarely stimulates the clitoris, our most reliable source for the ultimate pleasure.
25. Less sex means more work. If you’re not having sex, what are you doing with your time? Chances are, you’re working more. Men and women both turn to work to fill the void when they have sex less than once a week, according to a survey of 32,000 people by the University of Gottingen in Germany. Bo-RING.
26. A little cleavage goes a long way. Do you really think you look hot with your shirt buttoned up to your chin? Or a T-shirt shrouding your tankini? Get over yourself already. You may have stretch marks and spider veins everywhere else, but with the right support, your boobs can still hold their own. So let ‘em show, and you’ll feel sexier than you have in a long time.
27. Making the first move…is as much a turn-on for you as it is for him.
28. It’s not you…it’s him. Contrary to popular belief, men aren’t always ready and raring to go—especially middle-aged men. Many go through their own form of menopause as their testosterone levels start to drop. After the age of 40, testosterone levels decline approximately 1 percent per year, with a steep drop between the ages of 45 and 50. So if he takes longer or is less gung-ho, go easy on him…and yourself.
29. He doesn’t care if you can’t quite button your pants
30. His nipples are as much fun as yours. Imagine if your partner never touched your nipples during foreplay or sex. Ignored them entirely. Well, why are you ignoring his? Men’s nipples are as important to them as yours are to you. Slightly more than half of the men surveyed in a 2006 study by the University of Sheffield in England said nipple stimulation caused or enhanced their arousal. But only 17% ever asked for it.
31. Nobody wants to hear about it. Spare your friend, sister, college roommate and, especially, your colleague the details of your sex life. It might have been fun to compare notes in your twenties, but as a grown woman, it’s embarrassing and just plain gross. Put yourself in their shoes—Do you really want them to picture you and your husband doing it on the roof?
32. Smutty is sexy. Dirty talk (aka “Aural Sex”) is a real turn-on for some couples. It can be as clean or raunchy as you both like. Just make sure you know where your partner draws the line between dirty and disgusting.
33. Casual sex isn’t for everyone. Brief casual sexual encounters may sound like a kick, but for many women, they’re not a great experience. In a 2008 study by the University of Durham in England, only 54% of the women who’d had a one-night stand had positive feelings about it. Surprise, surprise: 85% of men thought it was just dandy.
34. Anything goes. What used to be too “kinky” to contemplate is jolly good if you’ve finally shed your inhibitions in your old age. What better time to make a sex tape, strip, try a threesome or whatever you’ve secretly wanted to do? Guaranteed, if it’s exciting to you, it will be orgasmic for your mate.
35. The toes have it. Next time you go down on your mate, go way down. If you haven’t discovered this already, toes are one of the key erogenous zones for both men and women, along with fingers, earlobes and the back of the knees.
36. He doesn’t care if you haven’t showered
37. Romance can last forever…or at least for a long time. New research shows that long-term relationships can keep their sexual chemistry, intensity and engagement going strong. If they’re missing the passion of short-term relationships, that’s probably a good thing, according to a 2009 study by Stony Brook University in California. That means they’re also free of anxiety and insecurity.
38. It’s not you…it’s your hormones. How does pre-menopausal mess up your sex life? Let us count the ways:
Your period lasts forever: you bleed like a stuck pig for seven days, and stain for another three
39. Marrieds do it more. Believe it or not, if you’re married, you’re having more sex than single people. That may not be saying much—the average of times that married people have sex is 69 per year. But that’s nine more than single people do, according to a 2002 study by the National Opinion Research Center at the University of Chicago. And by now, you’re old enough to know that quality counts more than quantity
40. He thinks you’re hot…just the way you are
|Lizz Winstead, Co-Creator of Daily Show, Launches Lady Parts Justice
Look, it’s time to stop being polite and start asking, “What the fuck do you think you are trying to pull here?”It is time to ask, “Why the fuck are men and women who are inexcusably incompetent continually being elected into statehouses, governorships and THE UNITED STATES CONGRESS? And how the fuck is it that this asshole serves on THE SCIENCE COMMITTEE of The House of Representatives?!ENOUGH.
Women are not faking rape and they don’t have magical powers to deactivate rape sperm. We are not pregnant before we are pregnant, we can’t have an abortion if we are not pregnant, and I think we can all agree, women shouldn’t be forced to carry stillborn babies.
Abortions don’t cause mental instability and the HPV vaccine doesn’t make girls mentally retarded. No woman’s boss should be able to demand information from her to decide if her reason for wanting birth control is moral enough to grant permission.
OH Yeah, and Planned Parenthood isn’t turning Girl Scouts into Commulezzies
And Double OH YEAH-
No state should ever have the right to shove a probe in a woman’s vagina against her will because the government has elected shitwits who think women are such irrational idiots that the government knows best about what is right for them, their bodies and their futures.
So why am I scribbling all these ridonculous implausible scenarios?
Because these are either actual laws, proposed laws, or reasons used by politicians who have been elected to public office.
No, I am not fucking with you right now.
Guess small government means ONLY legislating small spaces. Namely vaginas.
I have been touring the country for almost two years, raising money and awareness for Planned Parenthood and NARAL. I have talked to clinic workers who walk through lines of protestors who shriek “Killer!” and “Whore!” at them EVERYDAY because they have decided to help give women accessible and affordable healthcare.
I have lived through the shame and judgment of being a pregnant teen myself.
THE SHAME IS BULLSHIT.
I will no longer allow these devout hateheists be the loudest voices in the conversation and legislation about reproductive rights.
I am not afraid to talk about abortion, because it is safe, legal, and necessary.
There should be no shame in doing what is best for you when you are faced with an unplanned pregnancy.
It is laughable that leaders of a country that recently led us into an unplanned war, doesn’t plan for the solvency of a healthcare system for our elderly and our poor, AND not only doesn’t plan for, but also demonizes, scientific evidence that shows our changing climate will destroy us all, would THINK THEY HAVE SOME MORAL OR LEGAL AUTHORITY to decide how a woman should deal with an unplanned pregnancy.
Wait – Maybe that’s why they are so hell bent on destroying Planned Parenthood. It has the word “Planned” in it.
I find it reprehensible that more and more the cruelty of ignorance is becoming the guiding principle of many politicians in this country.
Last spring, Martha Plimpton and I joined forces with some fierce warriors in the War on Women, and formed A Is For, to help raise awareness about the plague of anti-women legislation being proposed and passed, not only by congress but sweeping statehouse after statehouse across the country.
Today I am launching www.ladypartsjustice.com a place where we create messaging that dares to speak the language of truth, without giving a rat’s ass about how it will be judged by the self-righteous.
I hope that through the lens of humor we can expose how bad this War on Women has gotten and just what is at stake. I hope others will join me to drown out and put to pasture those politicians who abuse the privilege of serving their country with legislation that chips away, in every way, the options of a woman to achieve her potential.
Please join me.
|9 Completely Different Opinions On How Many Sex Partners Women “Should” Have
How many people should a woman sleep with in her lifetime? Many people think they know the exact right answer.
10 – That’s the number picked by the most users of the cheating website SeakingArrangement in a (non-scientific) survey as the ideal for men and women. Nikki Howarth, a party planner, opined on the survey to the Daily Mail: “You want to date a man who is confident and knows what he is doing sexually.” But for women, it’s different: “My advice to any girl is: don’t tell, particularly if your figure is above ten. Most guys will think worse of you.”
5 – When AskMen surveyed male readers on how many sex partners made a woman promiscuous, the most popular answer was 5. But that was the lowest number available — it’s possible that given the choice, guys would’ve gone even lower.
20 – That’s how many men Anna Faris’s character in What’s Your Number? had slept with when she decided she absolutely couldn’t have sex with any more people, and thus had to marry one of her ex-boyfriends. To the credit of society at large, viewers were unimpressed with this premise.
30 – Last year, blogger Naked With Socks On said that “there’s no universal answer” to how many men a woman should sleep with. Then he added, “If a woman is in her mid 20s and already has 30+ partners I’m definitely going to give her the side-eye.”
17 – AskMen columnist Heidi Muller wrote, “No matter what people say, hearing that your girlfriend has bedded 17 men before you and she’s only 23 years old, yeah, that’s kind of a stretch (no pun intended).” It’s possible that older women get a little more wiggle room — later she mentions 20 as the number men consider “horrible.”
5-10 – Ed Housewright wrote on Single Dad House, “What’s the maximum number of sex partners you could accept for a woman you’re serious about? For me, I’d say less than 10. Actually, closer to five.” He doesn’t have a reason, other than that those numbers “reflect my comfort zone with a woman’s sexual history.”
25 – The Frisky conducted a poll on this issue, and respondent Liz said, “More than 30 sexual partners for anyone is too many…actually maybe more than 25.” She’s a fan of gender equality — this number apparently holds for men and women.
100 – Another respondent to the Frisky poll, Megan, was a bit more forgiving: “I think over 100 is really excessive.” Her limit also applied to both men and women.
1 – Of course, many religious conservatives argue that all people should have just one sex partner over the course of their lives: their spouse. Last year, for instance, Glenn T. Stanton wrote at Focus on the Family, “Science is now showing us what our grandmothers and pastors knew all along. Having sex with someone who is not our spouse can have a real, measurable and harmful impact upon later relationships.”
23.89 – According to a very scientific average of all the above numbers (using 7 for that 5-10 range), the absolute perfect number of sexual partners for a woman to have is 23.89. If you haven’t been with that many yet, get to work. And if you’ve already topped that number, we guess it’s too late for you to be perfect!
15 Things That Turn Men Off
It’s not easy for a man to tell his wife or girlfriend what she does to irritate him. But sometimes it’s important for couples to healthily air their grievances. Don’t think of this list as the 15 things we dislike about you. Think of it more as the 15 things that will bring us closer … by you not doing them.
Not Look Out For You
Assume We Get It
Not Really Listen
Devalue Our Feelings
RSVP for Us
Over-Think the Future
Obsess Over Details
Take Us For Granted
Scoff at Chivalry
Devalue Our Friends
5 Online Dating Mistakes You’re Making
We checked with some of our favorite male counterparts to find out their biggest pet peeves about women when it comes to online dating, and we had to agree – sometimes we aren’t exactly putting our best foot forward. Here’s what we’re doing entirely wrong and how to fix it.
Posting revealing pics
Waiting for an email from Prince Charming
Discounting the shorties. And the baldies
Fudging your age
Bringing up your exes
Sex Ed (for Girls): How to Spot a Douchebag
Young ladies, you’re in your teens now and already you have no doubt run into some guys who are being suspiciously nice to you. Likely you have figured out that in many cases, this has nothing to do with them being nice guys and everything to do with them desperately wanting you to touch their boner.
What you may not realize is that over the next few years, a string of rejections will cause many of these men to start hating you. Some of them hate you already, because they grew up hating their mothers and it kind of carries over. Boys are like that.
Now, some of these men will then become members of the Pick Up Artist Community, also known as the Seduction Community. This is a loose club of guys who see females as a collection of walking masturbation aids. They have websites and seminars and chat rooms where they trade tips on how to manipulate you into having sex with them.
They believe the male/female relationship is adversarial in nature, and that sex is a way of conquering you. Thus many of their techniques work by playing on your insecurities, like “the Neg,” where they first engage you in conversation, then drop subtle criticisms that will undermine your self-esteem and subconsciously make you want to gain their approval (by letting them touch your boobs). Believe it or not, it works–if you’re not ready for it.
This is just one type of douchebag; this class will cover several varieties. And, while we’re not telling you not to sleep with these men, the lesson you will learn from this course is that they will put the same effort into making you happy as they do the semen-encrusted sock under their bed.
6 Valuable Lessons From One Night Stands
Have you learned anything important from a one-time romp?
The best way to find out how best to cope with things you may not have much experience with is to hear the stories of other people. They’ve already road tested these bits of advice, so you know they have to have some knowledge involved, right?
After doing a poll on the awkward, exciting, bizarre situation that is the one night stand, we found out lots of advice coincides. Here are the most rational, practical and popular ones!
1. Orgasmic? Not Quite
2. Wrap It Up
3. It’s Not Really About Good Sex
4. Remember His/Her Name
5. You Don’t Need Another Facebook Friend.
6. Leave In Style
The Biggest Big-Boob Problems Busty Ladies Face
If you have big boobs you know that sometimes they’re more of a pain than they are a gift. Busty Girl Comics shares some of the funniest problems those on the bustier side face.
So for all you well-endowed women out there, know that you are not alone and own your big boobs. And for all small boobed women, you might have your own problems but they ain’t nothing compared to these:
Problem 1: Running isn’t the best option
Problem 9: You are forever a back sleeper
Things Every Woman Should Have Been Told About Sex, But Probably Wasn't
“What is something about sex that you wish someone had told you?”
1. There is no dignified way of “cleaning up” — and you WILL need to clean up afterwards.
2. A male partner won’t always have a higher sex drive than you.
3. You can have as much sex as you want, with as many people as you like.
4. Sex is truly awesome when you really love the person you’re having it with.
5. Women are allowed to enjoy sex as much as men.
6. Sex doesn’t look like it does in the movies — or in porn.
7. You are not more valuable as a person if someone wants to have sex with you, and you are not less valuable as a person if you choose not to.
8. Learn what turns you on and don’t be afraid to ask for it, because your partner isn’t a mind-reader.
9. It’s fine to say “no” — it doesn’t make you less sexual.
10. The best sex is about mutual giving.
11. Plenty of women can’t orgasm from intercourse alone. An estimated 50 to 75 percent of women require clitoral stimulation.
12. It’s easy to get caught up in the moment, so know how you plan to protect yourself from pregnancy and STDs beforehand.
13. Great sex does not equal great love.
14. Anxieties and fears about sex are totally normal — and it’s (more than) fine to talk about them.
15. Just like with anything else, to get good you need practice. Sex is not something you’re born knowing how to do well.
16. It can be really, really awkward.
17. Your “sexual peak” won’t necessarily be in your twenties.
18. Experiment! (And have fun doing so.)
Unlucky In Love? This May Be Why
The Number One Reason You’re Still Single
No one ever said that dating was easy. But you may actually be making it harder on yourself than you realize. Recent dating studies suggest that during the search for Mr. Right, some women have been becoming Miss Impossible to Please. Here are nine signs that you’re a little too picky when it comes to finding a guy.
You’re Too Focused on Looks
You’re Anti Online Dating
You Don’t Do Setups
You Facebook Stalk
You’re From Brooklyn
You Quiz Dates
You Don’t Do Younger
45 Things That Are Better Than Having A Boyfriend
All the single ladies, put ya hands up.
Having a rock star career.
Getting to travel or move anywhere in the world without feeling guilty or restrained.
Harry Potter Marathon Weekends.
Any and everything related to Beyonce.
Rolling up “squad deep” to parties and bars with your friends.
And then leaving equally squad deep to go get in yoga pants and laugh about every ridiculous escapade of the evening.
Re-reading The Fault in Our Stars 10 times.
Learning something new and unexpected that changes you for the better.
Singing obnoxiously in the car.
Knowing concretely that wine had to be said multiple times on this list.
Hanging out with your mom.
That miraculous moment when no one is really at the gym.
It’s like, PRIVATE GYM, WHAT UP.
Having some time by yourself to just stand outside and soak up the overwhelming joy that you’re alive.
Seriously, that crap can be half off.
The song “Problem” by Ariana Grande.
French fries. If you tell yourself you don’t have a deep passion for French fries, you’re just lying to yourself.
Finding a new hobby or interest.
Actually having the time to dedicate to exploring that new hobby or interest.
Entire containers of Ben and Jerry’s.
EOS lip balm.
Making a new best friend when you least expect it.
Movies with Ryan Gosling in them.
Taylor Swift girl power anthems.
Eating a home-cooked meal after you haven’t eaten anything that wasn’t frozen or packaged for too long.
Having a surplus of pillows.
Dancing like a diva.
Understanding that half of these items are more comical than accurate and yet there is an underlying truth. What is the greatest part about not having a boyfriend? It’s understanding that you do not require one to be complete. You should be happy with who you are on the inside, and content watching Netflix marathons and going out with friends. When the right guy comes around, he will. Until then, go blast some Beyonce ladies, being single is a beautiful thing.